time check, Ouch!!!--> can`t sleep, body clock is still all in a mess
Phatty--> A doctor takes his car to the mechanic to be repaired,,,the mechanic has a go at him about how he does the same thing with fixing the valves inside the engine as the doc does with the valves in the heart of the body,,, but un-happilly the mech says that you get paid way way more than me, for the same job
the docs reply was--> try doin it with the engine still running
& i don`t think i have anywhere near nine lives left now-days Phat, by my count maybe only a couple left.
but in saying that, i was just told by some elderly Egyptian or polish or Czech woman nurse (not sure what nationality but seemed more like she was a gypsy or something) that i`ve just """Pushed the Devil off the Shovel 3 times""" , so she reckons that means i will live a long healthy & happy life from now on... weired me out pretty big actually,,, it was like she was looking right through me as she told the story ... gave me goose bumps
Jacob, sounds funny but thanks for not coming around bro, you`re a good man & i really do hope you get better soon, & get your bum over here when you can, we have some auto-gearboxes to help Kev with
SteveOB, you`re sooo right my friend, thanks man
Goodie,,, i`m onto the Cayenne pepper, chillies, capsicum etc & the relationship with vitC & a whole pile other wild natural plant extracts & herbs including the Alkaline health diet tips,,, & wow there`s soooo many amazingly wonderful things out there that i bet hardly anyone knows about... Now i wish i was an ancient Chinese herbalist,,, well maybe better re-phrase that into --> i wish i married the hot spunky rich daughter of an ancient Chinese herbalist

(no offence to Marly meant of course

)
edit--> forgot to tell you guys about the 4am after the last op crisis
so,,, after this last op, & after laying almost perfectly still for about 5 hours while the hole in my groin to the femoral artery where they put the stent through, trys to heal (good joke that one when they`re feeding you piles of aspirin) but anyways,,, they finally un-click this machine/frame thing that holds a balloon type thing that`s been slowly but surely releasing pressure from the wound over that 5 hour period, bit by bit, allowing time for it to clot & seal & heal,,, then they ever so carefully take the frame/machine/balloon thing off & warn me about it bleeding out,,, & sounds pretty obvious but you really don`t want an artery the size of a 5 cent piece in diam to P1$$ blood,,, it doesn`t take much more than a minute & you`d be quite dead with that much blood gushing out
so,,, they finally sort that & dress it nice & clear me to get up & walk around & go to the toilet etc , but be careful any cough or sneeze & i have to hold pressure on the wound for at least another day-ish
righty-o i`m all good... i do some business later in the night & i`m ok,,, i`ve got a mobile thingy for the bleep-bleep monitor machine hooked up for cardio pulses & crap, so i`m onto it all , quite used to it now days & doin ok, so i`m off to sleep
But,,, 4 in the morning & i`m woken by alarms beeping behind my head & i look down & one of the wire-clip things for the heart monitor has unplugged itself off my belly,,, happens heaps & heaps, i must have done it 2 or 3 times a day both times i`ve been in hospital with this stuff... so no dramas right?
But,,, as i`m trying to stick it back on hope-ing that the beeping hasn`t woken up too many other patients, i see my pajamas jumping up & down & all in a pretty dark red colour,,, well,,, guess what that was???
My wound has sprung a massive "pumping" leak & god knows how long ago it started to p1$$ but i freak out & "Mush" my fingers onto it to try to stop it,,, there`s blood literally everywhere!!!!,,, all over the bed sheets,,,, all over my PJs,,, all over everywhere... probably a bucket full by the looks (& no, obviously not a bucket full cause i reckon i`d be dead if it were that much but it certainly looked like it initially & yes i really did freak cause they warned me how dead i`d be if it p!$$ed freely)
so ,,, seems i`ve successfully plugged the leak with my fingers, but what now???,,, i`ve already stopped the damn bleeping noise fitting that clip thing back on so there`s no nurse coming to my aid,,, i look up & i can`t even see where she is,,, she`s not at her station, maybe in the P1$$er i think--> so i get up, have a bit of a walk around & she`s off at another nurses station up the corridor playing on what looked like an i-pad

so i quietly walk up behind her, tap her on the shoulder & as she turns to see me, i casually point down at my groin,,, just like i always do whenever i meet good looking nurses
she freaks out worse than i do, runs to get another nurse, who , when she see`s it, freaks out even more & runs away to get another nurse & so on,,, i get told to go back to bed & they`ll sort it ... but by now all the lights are on, there`s bells & whistles goin off everywhere & i`d reckon every single patient in the whole cardiology ward is now wide awake
There`s about 5 nurses flustering around me, some are ripping the sheets off the bed, 3 are attending my wound,one has taken over the pressure placement in my groin, another is trying to tidy up all the blood that`s just covered me everywhere & i mean "Everywhere" so i`m getting my "you know what cleaned up really well too",,, & she was definately a pretty girl (got a wink & a smile from her)
They grab that machine/frame/balloon thing again & it really is a pain in the butt, so i say to them how`s about i just hold my finger on the hole till it stops & i`ll clean it again with an alcohol swipe thingy & stick a band-aid/dressing thing on it after that yeah?
& funny as,,,(the dumb-ar$e looks on their faces) they agreed
so almost dead again ,,, lucky i pulled a monitor clipy thing off in my sleep hey?